Cambodia nominates Donald Trump for the Nobel Peace Prize after brokering a ceasefire with Thailand, joining Pakistan and Israel in praising his global peace efforts amid growing international recognition.
By MediaBites Satire Desk – August 8, 2025
In what scholars are now calling the “Golden Era of Gratitude,” Cambodia has officially nominated Donald J. Trump for the Nobel Peace Prize, citing his “visionary and innovative diplomacy” in halting five days of border fighting with Thailand — and possibly saving the Cambodian mango export industry from ruin.
This marks the third nomination for Trump by a country he probably couldn’t locate on a map. Cambodia joins Pakistan, which previously nominated the former U.S. president after a “historic” ceasefire between India and Pakistan (brokered via a very strongly worded tweet), and Israel’s Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, who credited Trump for “moral support” during one of Gaza’s quieter afternoons.
With Trump’s Nobel portfolio growing faster than his legal fees, global leaders are reportedly scrambling to get in line.
Sources close to Vladimir Putin hinted at a possible Russian nomination of Trump if he helps “de-escalate” tensions in Ukraine — perhaps by teaching Zelensky how to say “let’s make a deal” in English. Meanwhile, Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky is allegedly open to nominating Trump if he promises to stop sending Elon Musk over to explain things.
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Even Benjamin Netanyahu, who’s already nominated Trump once, is considering a second application if Trump manages to “bring a temporary truce between me and the Israeli Supreme Court.”
Meanwhile, Hamas leaders, clearly impressed by Trump’s ceasefire record and “tremendous deals,” are reportedly drafting a joint nomination letter — but only if Trump agrees to wear a keffiyeh for the photo op.
Mangoes, Tariffs, and World Peace
Cambodia and Thailand were facing the wrath of Trump’s legendary trade temper when conflict broke out. According to leaked transcripts, Trump allegedly told both countries during ceasefire negotiations, “I’ll lower your tariffs if you just stop with the kabooms for, like, a week — maybe two. Trust me, nobody’s better at peace.”
Miraculously, the fighting stopped. Cambodia’s mango exports were saved. Trump’s tariffs were softened. And a global sigh of confused relief was heard across the ASEAN region.
Nobel Peace Race: The Reality Show You Didn’t Ask For
Experts warn that at this rate, the 2025 Nobel Peace Prize may turn into a geopolitical “Thank You Card” competition — with each nation competing to out-flatter Trump in exchange for lighter tariffs, a retweet, or the highly coveted Mar-a-Lago photo op.
Insiders say a reality show is now in development: “The Apprentice: Nobel Edition”, where world leaders pitch their ceasefires to Trump in a boardroom full of gold chairs and flags.
Will He Win?
The Norwegian Nobel Committee has yet to respond, but a spokesperson was overheard muttering, “We gave it to Obama for a speech — why not give it to Trump for a ceasefire and a mango deal?”
Stay tuned — peace has never been this hilarious.
